If you have a ticket to the Great American Beer Festival , it’s good to be you.  

For the uninitiated, the Great American Beer Festival is a yearly gathering of brewers from around the country put on by the Boulder-based Brewers Association. You could say it’s the king of beer festivals. This year, 432 breweries will have more than 1,900 beers on tap, and thousands will filter through the Colorado Convention Center sipping one-ounce samples of some of best beer America has to offer.  

But if all that sounds daunting, don’t worry. As a seasoned veteran of the festival, I have a few tips for you that will keep your trip tasting great and more fulfilling.

Get in Line

The festival is large and popular, so the line that forms to get into the convention center rivals anything you’ll see at a British tennis match. So, get there as early as you can. Sessions are only 4.5 hours, so spending a long time getting in the door means you’ll have less time to sample the goods.

All Over But the Shoutin’

At some point during your trip, you’ll hear a chorus of bellows waft across the convention space. Festival-goers have a tradition of letting out a loud groan whenever someone drops their tasting glass. Not surprisingly, the glasses get dropped with more frequency as the evenings progress.  

Regional Bias

The brewers are organized by region. So look at the GABF Web site ahead of time and figure out which regions have the most beers you’d like to try. Be sure to mix up the regions because there are some really good beers from around the nation. Otherwise, you’ll spend all your time screwing around in the California section. Check it out: http://www.beertown.org/events/gabf/ 

Over Hung

Drink plenty of water as you move through the festival. If you don’t, you’ll have a hangover like none you’ve ever experienced. While it’s possible to only drink what amounts to about five beers in terms of total consumption, you’re actually mixing 60 different beers that have different alcohol contents, tastes and textures. While five Buds won’t screw you up the day after, this will. And eat something, too.  

Five to try

Here’s five beers you won’t find in Colorado but you should be sure to try while you’re at the festival: 

Coconut Porter from the Maui Brewing Company of Maui, Hawaii. You’d think beer infused with coconut would taste like crap. You’d be very wrong.  

Darkness from the Surly Brewing Company of Eden Prairie, Minn. This stout is listed on several beer-snob Web sites as being in the top-30 beers brewed IN THE WORLD. 

Utopia from Boston Beer Company of Boston. This beer, made by the same people who brew Sam Adams, is the strongest beer in terms of alcohol by volume ever made. It tops out at around 24 percent. Drink just one, people.  

Wisconsin Belgian Red from the New Glarus Brewing Company of New Glarus, Wisc. This is a cherry beer brewed with pounds and pounds of Wisconsin cherries. The brewers only bring a limited supply to each session, so once you get in the door, get over to the New Glarus stand and get some. If you wait, you’ll miss it. It’s so much better than the Green Bay Packers.  

120-Minute IPA from the Dogfish Head Craft Brewery of Milton, Del. This beer will agree with you more than Joe Biden does. You can find this brew occasionally at $10 for a single 12-ounce bottle. But if you go the GABF, you’ll get the same beer funneled through raw hops for an extra bit of hoppiness. This is the ultimate hop spot for hop heads.  

Bar Talk

The people serving you the beers are mostly volunteers, but a lot of times you can talk to the people that actually made the beers. Don’t be afraid to find out. The brewers love to hear you talk about the quality of the beer they just served you.  

Etiquette, Please

Be sure to get in a line at a beer stand. Sometimes, it’s possible to miss them with all the people ambling around. This is one crowd where you won’t be able to claim drunkenness as an excuse for your crappy behavior.  

Designate

And remember, arrive alive. Get a DD or call a cab. There’s no use turning this dream of an event into an absolute nightmare. 

Photos Courtesy of Brewers Association and Jason E. Kapplan

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